


Déflorer

by GlimmerySKZ



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ninjas, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, First Time, Friends to Lovers, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentioned Im Jaebum | JB, Mentioned Kim Dahyun, Mentioned Other K-pop Artist(s), Mentioned Park Jisoo | Jihyo, Mentioned Yoo Jeongyeon, Ninja
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:20:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23963776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GlimmerySKZ/pseuds/GlimmerySKZ
Summary: There was nobody but Minho, Jisung wanted to lose his virginity to. He wanted to give his first time to his childhood friend, best friend, partner in crime, soulmate and the only person he ever loved. Yet he might had lost his chance. Now he had to face The Deflowered procession, which every ninja specialized in infiltration and seduction like him had to take part. He would lose his virginity to a peer, a faceless and nameless peer. His precious first time would be nothing but a part of his ninja duty.
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Comments: 43
Kudos: 138





	1. The Procession

**Author's Note:**

> Hello.
> 
> Please bear with me while I learn how to use AO3 for writers.
> 
> There will be around 4-5 chapters, maybe.

Jisung knew this day would come. He knew the moment had come when he was summoned by the District 9 Hidden Ninja Village Leader, Bang Chan. Jisung was a ninja with the light element, the most perfect kind of ninja for joining the Infiltration and Seduction Division. He was aware that he had no other choice but to do the training meant for preparing him. He had to do it to protect the village and most importantly, to protect the people he loved. He was also very aware that once a candidate of the Infiltration and Seduction Division was ready to join the division, the candidate had to do The Deflowered procession, or to word it in simple way; the candidate should lose their virginity.

Losing his virginity was an important if not the most important requirement Jisung had to fulfill before he could officially join the Infiltration and Seduction Division.

"You are ready, Jisung."

That fateful afternoon Jisung was summoned by te leader Bang Chan. It was uncommon for the leader to be directly involved in the ranking raising process. Yet, Chan took his time to be able to speak directly to him.

"You are ready to start taking missions from the Infiltration and Seduction Division." 

Jisung dreaded the day the higher up would recognize that he was indeed capable of doing missions for the Infiltration and Seduction Division. But part of himself wanted to fail the training so he would never join the said division. 

"You will go on a mission in a week.”

Jisung fully understood that even though Chan said it in a soft tone, it was an order and he had no way out. 

"You are a great asset for our village Jisung."

  
He knew the saying that dictated, 'Each of Han Clan members was born to be in the Infiltration and Seduction mission.' So far the saying was proven to be correct.

"I will assign you to a mission in Snow Ninja Country. Only you can do this mission."

Jisung's jaw tightened at the mention of Snow Ninja Country, he subconsciously clenched and unclenched his small fists. He knew that Chan was correct, only a ninja with a light element can win a battle against a ninja with a snow element.

"I really wish I don't have to send you this early to a mission, a mission from Infiltration and Seduction Division none less. You are young Jisung, very young. You just turned 18 last month, right? But our information sources in the boundary regions gather the information that Snow Ninja Country is on the move."

Oxygen was robbed from Jisung's lung when he heard that piece of information. Jisung knew what being 'on the move' meant, there was a possibility Snow Ninja Country would start another great war, there was a possibility that District 9 Hidden Ninja Village would be attacked for the second time. Most importantly, there was a possibility he would lose everyone he loved for the second time. Jisung was beyond terrified but if he was the only one who could prevent the war and protect the people he loved then he would willingly do the mission.

"I understand Chan" After making sure he won't crack his voice Jisung answered obediently. 

"Thank you so much Jisung, your willingness to do the mission means a lot to our village and of course our people."

At that moment, Jisung could see something flash in their leader's usually stoned eyes. Jisung recognized the gratefulness in Chan's eyes. Yet, other than gratefulness, Jisung recognized another emotion. Guilt. Guilt was visible in his eyes.

"Because you need to go next week, then we don't have a choice but to do your Deflowered procession as soon as possible."

Jisung could feel Chan's voice was laced with guilt and reluctance. No matter what happened during the previous Great War, Chan used to be his Preschool teacher in Ninja Academy. Jisung only nodded his head. He listened to Chan’s voice delivering all information regarding his Deflowered procession. All the information he had known by heart.

"We will prepare a room in a secluded area in our Headquarter for your procession. One of your peers will be your partner for your procession. Your partner will be chosen according to the Higher District 9 Ninja Village Board. The Board will choose someone perfect for you, someone who can handle his mission well. Someone who can differentiate personal life matters and ninja duty. No personal attachment. Only professionalism. Your partner's identity will be an absolute secret. No one but The Board members will know his identity. He will be wearing our ninja village gear and mask. He won't speak a word during the procession. He will never take off his mask. He will be chained by blood seal so he will never be able to tell any soul that he is your procession partner. He will perform genjutsu (mind jutsu) on you before he enters the room so you won't be able to recognize him even if you know him. He will never release the genjutsu from you before the procession ends. Your mind will be hazy and you won't be able to recognize his voice if the circumstances require him to talk to you. After the procession ends he will use another genjutsu on you so you will fall asleep. He will carry you back to your room. He will leave no trace of his existence. He will leave you by yourself. The next morning you won't remember a thing from the procession." 

Jisung thought he would be able to handle the fear of losing his virginity to some faceless and nameless peer for the sake of ninja duty and protect his village, yet he was wrong. He was so wrong. He loved someone already. And he was selfish enough for desiring giving his first time to the person he loved, Lee Minho, a comrade ninja with a fire element. It didn't matter how much Jisung pretended as if he didn't care about his first time, because in the back of his mind Jisung always wanted to be touched, caressed and taken by Minho. Jisung wanted to give Minho his virtue and love even if said boy didn't love him back.

"I understand." 

But reality was reality. His destiny and fate dictated him to give his first time like it was nothing. 

"The procession is meant to protect you Jisung. You never know what will happen and what the mission requires you to do."

Yes, of course Jisung knew that. The procession was meant to protect him. He knew in Infiltration and Seduction Mission sometimes the mission bearer had to give their all, literally. He heard some ninja got pregnant because of the mission. The Deflowered procession was meant to protect him because it was better to lose your virginity to your comrade, a peer, compared to an enemy. It was better to be aware that you would lose your virginity rather than being taken without warning. It was better to have no recollection of the first time rather than a traumatic experience.

"I am really sorry Jisung."

It was new, he heard that the tough leader Bang Chan never once said sorry to anyone. Yet here he was, throwing an apology to a low rank ninja like him. 

"It is okay. What should be done must be done." 

Jisung knew it was inevitable, it was his fate. Jisung was ready to ask for permission and leave the leader‘s office when Chan suddenly said something that made him realize that maybe fate wasn't that cruel.

"Your procession will be held in four days. You have three days Jisung, three days to find your partner for the procession. I will speak to The Board. I want to make an exception for you."

Jisung almost cried in joy when he heard the leader. Maybe it was pity but he didn't care, ninja's life was short so he would take what he can get.

Unknown to him, Chan was replaying a memory of two small children from years ago.

_"Minho, don't get mad at me. That boy just asked me to teach him how to throw kunai. I still love you the most. I promise I will be your bride. Your best bride. And I will be your wife. The best wife in the world!!"_

_"Okay... Jisung okay... I forgive you.... but promise me you will only talk and play with me. 1 don't like sharing what is mine!!"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here it is.. the first chapter!   
> I hope you guys like it!   
> Again I'm still learning how to work AO3 so it might be a mess.  
> If there is any gramatical error, I'm sorry, English is not really my first language.
> 
> Leave Kudos of you liked it~


	2. D - 3

Jisung's happiness soon turned into nothingness when he realized the situation he was in. The leader had granted him a really big gift. He was given a chance to choose his own partner for the procession, which means he was granted the chance to be a human rather than just a ninja. The leader treated him as if he was not merely a pawn in a chess match. He would be able to lose his virginity to the person he favored. Yet, Jisung knew all too well that the only person he wanted hated him to the core. 

Lee Minho, the reason of Jisung’s sleepless nights when he was too far away doing missions with survival chances of less than 5 percent, hated him. Lee Minho, the reason Jisung always wakes up so early in the morning to go to the Training Field and came home far too late so he could be stronger and not an embarrassment, despised him so much to the point he always walked away to avoid being in the same room together.

Jisung was not sure when everything started to go wrong, he could still remember as clear as day that once upon a time Minho and him were best friends. They were joined by hips. They liked each other so much to the point they routinely had sleepovers. Jisung still remembered how technically they lived together. Inside Jisung's closest, half of it was Minho's belongings and vice versa. He could still remember how Minho basically proposed to him in their preschool days.

_"Jisung, I don't like it when you talk to other kids!"_

_Little Minho glared heatedly to Jisung's direction. They were just 6 years old._

_"But... he just...."_

_Jisung was not sure if he was wrong for helping Felix, that little boy was lonely and often got left out by other kids. He just wanted to make Felix all better. So Jisung just managed to blink his small eyes several times._

_"And I don't like you often talk to teacher Bang Chan!"_ _Minho kept his glare and even intensified it._

_"But... I need to..."_

_Jisung was also not sure if seeking help from their smart teacher was a bad thing. There were a lot of things his little brain could not process and understand so he did what he thought was right, asking help from their teacher. Jisung didn't know that it was something bad to do._

_"If you don't understand something you have to ask me not him. I am smart and I am sure you know it too."_

_Minho was a smart boy, of course Jisung knew that. People called him a prodigy, a genius. Jisung wasn't sure what all that meant, but Jisung knew Minho never had a problem doing things their teacher asked him to._

_"You are my future bride. You are not supposed to spend your time with other people but me." Minho continued._

  
  
_"What is bride?"_ _Jisung never heard that word before._

_"It means you are going to be my wife and I am going to be your husband."_

_He always knew that Minho was a little odd. Minho could already read all the books with difficult writing and no pictures. Minho knew the meaning of all difficult words Jisung didn't know it even existed. Minho often talked about something Jisung didn't understand. But all of those things only made him like the other more and more._

_"Wife?" Jisung again blinked his eyes._

_"Yes, it means you will live with me forever. You will cook for me every morning and I will help you prepare our breakfast. You will kiss me and I will kiss you. We are going to sleep together in one room just like our mother and father. We are going to have children. A lot of children. I want four!!"_

_Jisung didn't fully understand what Minho said. But he knew sleepovers with the other were always fun so he nodded his head vigorously._

_"Okay... I will be your bride. I will be your wife!"_

_"Good. Now, you should never talk to anyone without my permission!"_ _Minho grinned widely and little Jisung thought, sure, why not? So he nodded happily._

Jisung sighed at the memory. Before he knew it, he was engaged to Minho. Both of them were young and naïve so Jisung doubted they knew what actually meant to be wife and husband and their talk about children. Although now Jisung was fully aware he was capable of bearing children. He was a carrier. He was born with a womb. He was truly a Han clan member.

Sometimes Jisung wondered if Minho still remembered about the proposal or any of their childhood memories. Even though the chance was very slim, with the handsome ninja’s popularity. Minho constantly had girls and boys flocked around him. It was nobody fault really, He was one of the strongest ninja in their generation. He was the first to be a first rank ninja at age 15. He was a genius, a prodigy from Lee Clan. His fire jutsus were incredible. Not only that, his handsome face and proportional body was not a joke. Besides the appearance, Minho had a great personality. He was polite, humble and easy to talk to. He was friendly to anyone except for the short blonde named Han Jisung. Lee Minho was an epitome of perfection.

Minho was Jisung's first friend. He met him when he was still in diapers. His parents and Minho's parents were best friends and they were determined to make their children become best friends too. Minho's presence was constant in Jisung's childhood life. He was always there for Jisung and viceversa. So it was kind of inevitable for Jisung to fall in love with his best friend even before he truly knew the meaning of love.

Yet, without Jisung knowing their friendship fell apart at age 14. He was not sure of the reason. He assumed Minho finally noticed that he was only a burden for him, because he was the one who dragged the other down during their Ninja Academy days. Minho could graduate sooner if only he didn't insist he wanted to graduate together with his best friend. He could be the first rank ninja at age 14 if only he wasn't determined to stay in fourth rank just so his 13 years old self could be in the same rank with him.

Or, he sometimes thought that the reason Minho started dropping him like hot rock was because he finally noticed Jisung's feelings at age 14. Minho might have gotten scared because of Jisung's not so platonic feelings for him, or he might find Jisung disgusting. Because it was one thing to say you want to marry someone when you were so young and knew nothing about marriage. Yet, it was definitely different when you liked your friend the way you shouldn't at age 14 when you can already reason what was right and what was wrong.

And sometimes, Jisung thought that the reason Minho started hating him was because he was a Han. When they were at age 14 the Great War broke. Snow ninjas attacked their village without warning nor mercy and hundreds of people including District 9 ninjas died during the war. Jisung lost all of his family members during the war. He was the only Han alive right now. He was alive merely because of luck. That night he was having a sleepover at Minho's house so he escaped death. The Snow ninjas made sure to kill every Han even though they obviously failed the task because Jisung was still very much alive up till now.

Despite his loneliness, Jisung knew he didn't deserve sympathy because technically the Han clan was the reason for their great loss. Jisung's mother Han Seung Yeon retired from being a ninja from the Infiltration and Seduction Division so she could take care of him. Jisung's father, Han San Hyuk denied the order for doing an undercover espionage mission in Snow Country because the mission duration was indefinite and he didn't want to leave his family for a long time. If only his mother was still an active ninja. If only his father didn't deny the order, their village would definitely know that Snow ninjas were trying to attack them. If only the Han Clan did what they were supposed to do, the Great War would have never happened. And Minho... and Minho would still have his father and older sister now.

"Jisung hyung... What are you thinking about? You are spacing out."

A light and familiar voice snapped Jisung from his train of thought. Jisung sensed familiar chakras and let himself be evolved in a back hug for some seconds before he pulled away from the hug. 

"Just some things, Jeongin." 

Jisung managed to smile slightly to the apprentice of their teacher and leader Chan, Yang Jeongin, a comrade ninja with wind element. 

"I heard from Chan." Jeongin said softly.

"I am sure Chan will never talk about one's personal matter to others." Jisung smiled softly. He knew the younger had a little crush on him and sometimes he found Jeongin so cute. 

"Hahaha... you got me. I actually overheard him talking to the head of Board Park Jihyo." Jeongin smiled sheepishly, his cheeks were red. 

"You sure, you are not ears dropping?" Jisung teased him a little despite the fact he knew Jeongin was telling him the truth. 

"NO!! OF COURSE NO! Teacher Chan and Park Jihyo are not being secretive. They talk loudly. Or argued loudly to be exact. I am sure I am not the only one who knows about your matter now!"

Jisung nodded slowly. Of course, there was going to be an argument. Chan basically broke the rules and tradition to grant Jisung the right to choose his own partner for the procession.

"So... the procession.... The... partner... have you decided yet?" Jeongin asked nervously while sporting a really red face. 

**Minho... I want my partner to be Minho...** Jisung said in his mind yet he only presented a smile to Jeongin. 

"I- I really... you know... If you need... how to say it? ehmm... help... I can..." Jeongin said each chunk of word with much difficulty. 

"Thank you Jeongin. I really appreciate that. But I just..." Jisung understood what Jeongin was trying to say but he was not Minho and he only wanted Minho. 

"No pressure intended... I just... I just..." 

Jisung chuckled lightly, amused at Jeongin's panic expression. "I know Jeongin... I know.. But I..."

I just want to try my luck this time and see if I get what I want. Minho hated me so much, yet I really loved him. So I wanted to make this one time to see how it felt to be loved by him. I wanted to try to convince Minho to be my partner for the procession and after that I would give him what he always wanted. For me to stay away as far as I could. For me not to bother him again with my presence. For me to disappear completely from his life and never look back... Forever…

******

"I'm home." Jisung said softly as he entered the house. 

"Welcome home!! Oh my god!! I must be the luckiest person in this world to finally have my two favorite people in this world at home at the same time!!" A beautiful middle aged woman with dark shoulder length hair excitedly hugged Jisung once he stepped inside the house. 

"God must have granted my wish after years of praying to have both of you at the same time here!!" The woman kept talking while hugging Jisung even tighter. 

"Mother..." Jisung blushed madly, even though it had been years he was still not used to being welcome so warmly like this. 

"Yes my Jisungie? What is it? Don't be so stiff to me and call me mom already!" The woman finally released her hug and pinched Jisung cheeks softly before she pulled herself away.

"Mother, I don't think..."

"Yes... yes... I understand your reason... Yadda... Yadda... I don't want to hear any of it anymore. Just come here and be my guest to taste my cooking. We are having a feast today Jisungie. I want to feed both of you well." 

That was when Jisung's body suddenly got stiff because he just realized something.

"Minho.... Is home mother?"

Ever since all of Jisung's family members were killed, Minho's mother had insisted on Jisung living together with her and of course... Minho. At that moment Jisung was terrified and young, the request from Minho's mother seemed like such a gift from God to him. Without wasting his time he said yes and moved in. At that time Jisung was glad to have his best friend and best friend's mother by his side. A couple of months after him moving into the house ran smoothly before slowly but surely Minho started to treat him differently. And slowly yet surely he started getting more and more uncomfortable because of Minho's demeanor. There were times when Jisung wanted to leave the house, so Minho could have peace in his own house, yet Minho's mother pleading eyes held him back.

"Yes... he is home. He just came back from the mission! Oh my god I am so excited!! Now... now... taste it Jisungie. How is it?" Minho's mother successfully dragged Jisung to the kitchen and offered a spoon of soup to be tasted by Jisung. 

"It is great mother, great as usual."

Jisung smiled widely. He stared at Minho's mother's content and happy face and at the view, guilt started spreading quickly to his whole body. He knew he was one of the reasons, if not the main reason, why Minho was always away doing long term missions in a far far away country. Minho didn't feel comfortable in his own home because Jisung was there, so he opted to stay away from his home. That was also one of the reasons Jisung always woke up extra early and came home almost at dawn every time Minho was home. Jisung wanted to give Minho his space. And to tell the truth it was because he couldn't stand Minho's cold eyes that were directed to him.

_It was still early in the morning for most people, yet for Jisung he was slightly late from his fixed schedule to train with Changbin and Seungmin, his teammates. Jisung rushed from his room in the second story of the house. Yet his step foot flattered when he met Minho in the stair._

_"You are here."_

_Jisung could never forget how cold Minho's eyes were that morning and how his tone cut something deep down inside his body. Minho only uttered those three words yet Jisung could read what was behind them. Minho didn't wish for him to be here, sharing the same air as him. Since that morning encounter, Jisung always made sure to leave the house two hours earlier and came back so late. Sometimes, he decided to spend the night in the training Field instead of coming home. Since that day, he always made sure to volunteer himself to any mission on Minho's days off. So far Jisung and Minho were never in the house at the same time._

Jisung sighed subconsciously, if only he didn't live in Minho's home, Minho's mother would have plenty of time to spend her time with her only son.

"Jisungie, sweetheart, is there something you want to tell me? Because I know something is bothering you." Minho's mother was a really good mother and really kind person. The kindest Jisung ever met.

"It's nothing mother." But for sure Jisung couldn't say what was actually in his mind, that despite how fully aware he was of Minho's hatred toward him, Jisung was in love with him. Despite how much Minho loathed him, Jisung decided to be selfish and wanted to be taken by Minho. 

Only this one time… Only this time…

"Okay... if you don't want to talk about that now I won’t ask. So... how is work?"

Jisung swallowed his saliva roughly. Minho's mother was a smart woman, she was a retired ninja and pretty familiar with what was in the ninja's world. "I am going to do a mission from the Infiltration and Seduction Division next week. Teacher Bang Chan said I am ready." he mustered his most calm posture before delivering the news.

“Oh…” The older woman for once in her life couldn't say anything. The atmosphere was thick for some seconds. "Jisungie... I am almost done with my cooking. Why don't you help me to wake Minho up? Ask him to clean himself, and you too darling, clean yourself and then we'll have our dinner?” She changed the topic.

If there was one thing he didn't understand from Minho's mother it was her choice to turn blind eyes toward her son hatred for him. Minho's mother always acted as if the two of them were still friends.

"Will do mother."

So he didn't have any other choice. He had taken Minho away from his mother, his family had taken her husband and daughter, thus the least he could do to make up for Minho's mother was to play along.

******

For some moments Jisung was just standing in front of Minho's door without moving. 

At one side it was like God gave him the biggest present ever. Chan allowed him to choose his procession partner, and now the only person Jisung wanted was here. Minho wasn't doing some dangerous mission far far away from Jisung. He was here, just some meters away from him. God gave him a chance to bring Minho who’s rarely home to be here just the time Jisung needed him the most. Yet, at the other side Jisung didn't know how he would convince Minho to be his partner. Last time they met each other, Minho's eyes were telling Jisung to get away from his sight and never reappear again. Jisung must be crazy for even dreaming that Minho would be willing to touch him and be his partner.

"Come in. I can feel your chakras." A soft voice startled him. 

Jisung blushed so hard. Of course, what he was thinking? Any ninja could recognize chakras of other ninjas, let alone a prodigy like Minho. Why he was being so stupid and made fool of himself by standing without moving in front of the door?

"I am sorry for intruding." Jisung finally entered the bedroom, only to see Minho lying down with one hand covering his face. His body was still. 

"What do you want from me?" The edge of Minho's voice sliced Jisung' s heart. Yet, he tried his best to stay unaffected. 

**I deserve it.**

**I deserve to be treated like this.**

**There is no need to put on a show by feeling hurt or worse crying or even worst pretending to be pitiful.**

Jisung kept chanting the mantras in his head. 

"I just wanted to let you know that mother almost finishes cooking and she wants you to clean yourself and join for dinner." Jisung said slowly. He must be strong, this might be a God given chance. God gave him a chance to speak to Minho about the procession. 

"Oh really? You know, sometimes I am wondering if she really loves me. You are more like a son to my mother than me." Minho kept his stature and cold tone. For a second Jisung's body got tense. 

_lt happened two months after Jisung moved to Minho's house. Today they were having Jisung's favorite dishes for dinner._

_"Thank you so much for the dinner mom." Jisung gleamed cheerfully while smiling widely. He was so happy tonight until later on Minho stopped by his room only to say hurtful things._

_"Why do you call her mom? She is not your mother, you know. She is my mother. Stop pretending to be pitiful and acting like you are some innocent and adorable kid, so everyone will dote on you. You are just some attention seeker. Don't you think a whole village's attention on you, the only Han alive was enough? Why do you have to steal my mother's attention too?"_

_That was the beginning of Minho's drastic change of behavior, and since that day he didn't dare to call Minho's mother with ‘mom’ again and started switching to ‘mother’._

"Of course, it is not true Minho. She loves you the most. You are her only son. She is..." Almost in panic Jisung spoke quickly before Minho cut him. 

"Stop..." Minho mumbled, yet Jisung heard all the same so he stopped talking altogether. "Stop saying my name. I don't like it when you say my name." 

Jisung's throat suddenly went dry. "I... am sorry. I won't do it again Min... I mean I promise I won't do it again." Jisung's voice was shaking yet it didn't seem to affect Minho. 

"Also, I don't need your sweet talk. If I want to hear some sweet talk you are the least person in this world I will come to."

Yes... of course... Jisung knew it was true, if Minho wanted to hear some compliments and sweet talks why would he come to him, the person that Minho hated so much? Why would he? When he was surrounded by a lot of attractive and beautiful girls and boys. The rumor had it that even Princess Dahyun from Moon Country was in love with Minho, after she was once guarded by Minho. So, even the Goddess of Moon was head over heels for Minho, who was Jisung to compete against such beauty?

"And of course I am her only son, why do you feel the need to remind me?" Minho's last sentences were such a blow to Jisung's heart. He was the reason Minho was the only son from Park Clan. He took away the other's beautiful, great and amazing sister, Lee Minyoung.

"I really am sorry." he was doing his best to hold his tears. 

**Stop it Jisung. Stop it!!**

**Minho was the one who lost his father and sister because of you, and he is not crying. So, what right did you have to cry over trivial matters such as being told off by Minho.**

Minho's bedroom was quiet for some moments.

"What else do you want from me? I heard you before that my mom wants me to clean up and join her for dinner." 

God must love Jisung so much for giving him a chance to speak to Minho more. 

**Let's get over it Jisung!**

**Tell Minho about your new division.**

**Tell him about how you need to go on the mission next week.**

**Ask him politely and nicely if he was okay to help you and be your partner.**

**Ask him to consider you as an old friend just this once.**

**Explain to him that you are scared of what will happen in the procession and he is the only person you can trust despite what has changed and happened between you and him.**

**Explain to him that once the procession finished you would get out of his life forever and as soon as possible.**

**Tell him that you will move out from his house whether his mother allows you or not.**

**Tell him that you will take a long term mission after one another so he will never have to bear the sight of you anywhere near.**

**Tell him that if once in a while his path and your path cross you will be okay with him pretending not to know you or if he wants to act as you are invisible.**

**Ask him to be your partner as a farewell gift even if you deserve no gift at all after all you have done to him.**

**Just one time...**

**Just one time before you will really let go of him.**

"I've been promoted to the Infiltration and Seduction division." Jisung tried to say it as calmly as possible. 

Finally Minho moved from his stance and opted to sit down and cross his legs on his bed. Minho didn't say anything and just stared at Jisung's direction. He felt a heavy burden placed on his shoulder because of Minho's eyes.

"So....what? Why are you telling me that Jisung? Do you want to mock me for telling you before that you will never make it as a ninja?" Minho shrugged his shoulder nonchalantly.

_"You have changed Jisung."_

_It was one week after the Great War ended and Jisung started living in Minho's home._

_"What do you mean?" Jisung replied while busy sharpening his kunai._

_"You train like there is no tomorrow, as if your life depends on it. It is just so not you. I remember you once told me that you don't want to be a ninja instead you want to open a flower shop. You told me ninja's life is not for you."_

_Minho's slight annoyed voice only brought a smile to Jisung's face. Yes it was true, before the Great War Jisung didn't have slight interest in being a ninja despite attending Ninja Academy. For Jisung, attending Ninja Academy was only a compulsory thing to be done with. Yet, after the Great War Jisung noticed that he couldn't stay a plain citizen of District 9 Hidden Ninja Village. What if snow ninja attacked them again? Ninja with the light element was the only ninja who could win against a ninja with the snow element. What if there would be more victims compared to before? What if Jisung would lose his most loved people again? Such as Minho's mother and... Minho? What if this time Minho was killed? What if he failed to protect him, the person that he loved? Jisung had known how bad it was to lose the people that you loved and he didn't want to go through that again. The Han clan was at fault for not doing what they were supposed to do and dragged down hundreds of innocent people with them, Jisung didn't want such a thing to happen again._

_"Something just has to be done Minho."_ _Jisung smiled lightly._

**_Especially if I want to protect you. I am not a prodigy like you. I need to train very hard if I want to make sure you will be safe. I cannot lose you too. Not you. I will die if something happens to you and I cannot do something to prevent it._ **

_Minho was quiet for some minutes before he asked another question. "Is it because you are the only Han alive?"_

_Jisung didn't directly answer the question until he finally firmly answered. "Yes Minho, because I am the only Han alive now."_

**_So, if Snow ninjas attack again I will be the only one who can protect you. It is because no matter how great your fire jutsu is you won't be able to win against snow elements. I will protect you with all I got._ **

_At that moment Jisung thought the conversation had ended because the other didn't talk anymore, yet it was proven to be wrong._

_"Do you want to hear my honest opinion Jisung?"_

_And before Jisung could react, Minho already continued calmly._

_"I think it's better for you to stop being a ninja, or to be precise stop trying to be a ninja. You are too weak to be a ninja and you are not the brightest person I have met. You even have difficulty in understanding simple matters. So for sure, you are no good for the job. You will only be a burden to your teammate. The only thing you have is your pretty face. Stop trying Jisung. Sorry for saying this, but it is the truth. lf you continue, trust me that the higher you can reach is third rank ninja and you won't be able to escape that rank."_

_Jisung stood still at Minho's words, without knowing he dropped his kunai._

_"See... even just holding a kunai you cannot do it right. I am really sorry if my words hurt you but I am your best friend. It is my duty for telling you the bitter truth that nobody actually wants to tell you. I don't want you to get hurt in the future because of your incompetence"_

_"Then... i will try harder." Jisung finally managed to smile, at which Minho shook his head several times before making his way out from the Training Field. Jisung thought he saw pitiful stares from Minho directed to him._

**_I will try and do harder for you, Minho._ **

"So... you want to brag to me?" Minho sneered while standing up and stepping closer to the smaller. 

"No... I just..." 

Again Minho cut Jisung. 

"Well then... congratulations for joining the first rank ninja squads. You escape the third rank ninja and rise up high to be a first rank ninja."

"I.. No... That's not what I..."

"No... no... seriously Jisung. Congratulations for joining the first rank ninja squad. Infiltration and Seduction Division, right? A truly fit place for someone like you. As expected from someone like you. Congratulations for joining the elite member of ninja by... you know…” Minho's smirk got wider with each step he took; when he finally arrived beside Jisung he whispered “...being a prostitute." Minho gave Jisung one last smirk before he pushed Jisung away and stepped out from his room.

A lone tear escaped Jisungs' eyes.

A prostitute…

For Minho he was a prostitute for joining the Infiltration and Seduction Division. Yes... it was true that sometimes ninjas form Infiltration and Seduction had to use sex to commerce their mission. But still, being called on that matter by the person that he loved hurt like hell. Jisung couldn't hold his tears anymore. He silently cried. After years of loving Minho, he already mastered how to cry as silent as possible so people won't notice that he was actually crying.

That night Jisung failed to convey what he wanted from Minho....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for making Minho such a bad guy :'(  
> It hurts me too because I love him so much!  
> Please don't hate him too much~
> 
> Also Minho's sister that died, Lee Minyoung, is Miss A's Min. I tried to keep this JYP Nation as best as possible.. But also there is no other Han in JYP so I had to look for other groups lol.


	3. D - 2

Minho grumbled silently, he planned to spend his short days off by sleeping yet he had to deliver the report of his previous mission to the leader's office. He promised to himself that after this he would spend the rest of the day sleeping in his favorite hill.

"Minho hyung!! Woaaah.. I can't believe that you are here and not in some random country far far away doing a suicidal mission!" 

Yet, it seemed Minho couldn't make a smooth escape to his lazing spot because one of his ninja comrade and best friend, Hyunjin, a ninja with earth element greeted him so loudly. Hyunjin had a really big mouth and he couldn't stop talking or to be precise he didn't know when to stop talking. 

"Hyung... treat me to eat lunch!" Minho only shook his head lightly. "Come on hyung, you are one of the ninjas with the highest pay because you keep doing some illogical mission. Spend some money, will you?" Hyunjin dared to do some weird type of aegyo on Minho. But it only made the older shudder at the sight. 

"I spend money. I just don't want to spend some on you." Minho rebutted weakly. 

"Oh really? Then who do you spend your money on? You don't even have someone you like. So pleaseee hyung?" In the end Minho gave up and said he would treat Hyunjin because he didn't want to traumatize himself with his bad attempt at acting cute. 

"So... hyung... did you hear?" Here it was, Hyunjin won't stop talking until he fed Minho up with all the rumors and juicy details of each rumor. 

"Hear what?" Minho asked without interest. 

"Oh my god hyung. You haven't heard? Where do you live? Under a rock?" 

Minho didn't know how Hyunjin managed to keep talking while he stuffed himself with meat and rice. 

"It's really famous news among limited people, only the higher up and elite ninja squad like us of course! It is about our District 9 Flower!!" Hyunjin chewed his meal at an inhuman speed to be able to speak. 

"District 9 flower..." Minho mumbled the word strangely. 

"Oh... don't tell me you don't know who our District 9 Flower is!! Oh my god hyung!!" Minho just shrugged his shoulders. 

"Our District 9 Flower is Jisung, Han Jisung. The one that lives with you! You are obviously a lucky bastard!!" 

"He is District 9 Flower?" Again Minho asked weirdly. 

"Yes, of course! Who else? He is the most beautiful human being in this world!!" 

"Hyunjin....technically you have never..."

"Oh... shut it hyung. I just know that Jisung is the most beautiful human being in this world. Don't you see those big pretty eyes that will draw your soul into it? Don't you see that cute button nose? Or those red irresistible small lips? Or those plump cheeks? Oh... and his hands!! The most beautiful hands ever!! And his body... his seductive body. Oh my God!! Those collarbones! His hips! His very tiny slim waist! His sexy thighs!! His perky globes! That milky skin that tempts you to taint it. Just so so so so so perfect! The most perfect and beautiful person ever!!” Hyunjin almost drooled after he finished his monologue. Again Minho looked at him weirdly. "No... don't say it!! I am not a pervert! I am just a healthy man. And I am not the only one who agrees on all those things about Jisung." Hyunjin smiled innocently. 

"You mean... a lot of people agree that he is District 9 Flower?" Minho looked a bit unsure.

"Yes... it's anonymously hyung. Even some princes and leaders from other ninja countries have asked his hand for marriage through our leader Chan since he was just 15. Well... none of them were accepted because Jisung wasn't legal yet. But now that he is legal we'll never know what will happen. Chan’s office has been flooded by marriage proposals for Jisung. Even The Great Ninja Leaf Leader, Im Jaebeom sent his proposal! Really hyung... he is amazing. I am not sure how you don't think he is wonderful. Do you seriously not think that at least Jisung is attractive?"

Minho opted to eat a slice of meat instead of answering.

"Oh yeah... about the news... I haven't told you. So, Jisung will start taking missions from the Infiltration and Seduction Division next week. And you know... That means Jisung hyung needs to do the Deflowered procession."

"So what? It is pretty common for...."

"Shhhhh.... Hyung... Listen first. Chan has granted him the right to choose his own partner and Jihyo is against it. But still, the leader is Chan so Jisung now has full right to choose his partner. Right now, everyone is wondering who will be the lucky person to be chosen by him. I mean, who doesn't want to deflower the most beautiful flower in District 9?"

"So... even you Hyunjin?" This time Minho successfully cut Hyunjin.

"Hehehe... yes... for sure hyung. Jisung is sooo pretty, no one is able to resist him, well, maybe, only you. But, the story hasn't ended yet. Jaebeom sent a warning letter so the procession won't be held, because he wants Jisung for himself. And some other princes and leaders sent their letters too. They don't want Jisung to be placed in the Infiltration and Seduction Division. Jisung deserves more than that, a beauty like him should rule a country or village beside a powerful prince or leader, not doing some harsh work. Some letters even state they will break the ally agreement and declare war on our village if the procession is commenced."

"I am not sure how you manage to make up those kinds of things Hyunjin." Minho commented.

"HYUNG! I don't make any of those things up!! Don't you remember that because of that stupid rolling system for new batch of first rank ninja I ended up as the mail boy in Chan’s office? My job is to sort the letters received, I need to go through them while putting my life in line because who knows if some deranged enemy sends Chan some dangerous items. I read all of those marriage proposals hyung. I also read all those threatening letters. And Woojin, the former mail boy, tells me about how much pain he went through reading all the marriage proposals for Jisung before I came and took over his job. Also I heard by myself how Chan and Jihyo argued over Jisung’s procession. They were engaged in heated arguments and could not control their voice level, so it's not really my fault for listening to all those things." Hyunjin kindly explained how he knew all the things about Jisung. 

"Psssh... Like I care about anything related to your so-called District 9 flower. I am going now. I don't want to waste my precious free time to talk to you. Bye Hyunjin. Keep alive." Minho spoke indifferently while starting to leave the restaurant. "Oh... and one more thing, you are paying Hyunjin, because after I thought about it, you should be paying to celebrate my home coming."

Minho left a flustered Hyunjin who kept screaming about how he was being deceived by his own best friend and trusted hyung.

******

Jisung keeps shifting his weight from one foot to another one. He was so nervous while he watched something before his eyes. Jisung had concealed his chakras and right now he was watching Minho from afar. Jisung couldn't help a wide smile that spread across his face seeing a content Minho lying down on his favorite place peacefully. Jisung's breath hitched when he realized really how stunning Minho was, just lying without care and totally letting his guard down. Up till now, Jisung didn't understand how he managed to be madly in love with Minho when the boy constantly and consistently hurt him. Jisung couldn't comprehend how Minho was the reason for deep scars inside his heart yet he was also the cure for Jisung' heart. He didn't know how Minho managed to be the poison as well as the antidote for him.

**_“Congratulation for joining the elite member of ninja by... you know... being a prostitute”_ **

Minho words still echoed in Jisung's mind and by instinct clenched his chest to stop the pain that shook his body. Minho indirectly, or more directly, told him that he was merely a prostitute, that he was good for nothing but being a prostitute. Jisung blinked his eyes several times quickly to prevent his tears from falling.

**See? Minho already hates you with no end, so there is nothing to lose. Nothing you do will make him hate you even more because he already hates so much.**

**Just this time Jisung.**

**Just one last time for being selfish.**

**Ask him to be your partner, and that is all.**

**He doesn't have to agree to be your partner, because most likely he will reject you.**

**But still, still, you need to ask him, the result doesn't matter because all you need to do is ask him.**

**Without asking him you won't be able to let him go Jisung.**

**You have to do it so you can finally let him go and make him happy by disappearing.**

**Stop being a selfish bastard for your whole life Jisung.**

**If you really love him you will make him matter at any cost.**

**You will do anything to make him happy.**

  
  
**Even if it means you need to go far far away from him.**

**Just one last time.**

**Just this one time.**

Slowly but surely Jisung unconcealed his chakras and stepped closer to Minho's spot. Part of his heart carried a guilty feeling.

_"Jisung... come here... I want to show you something really great!!"_

_An 11 years old Jisung just finished taking a bath and got a surprise once he came to his room because an excited 11 years old Minho greeted him loudly._

_"Woaaah... calm down first Minnie! need to put on some clothes!!" Jisung tried to pry his hand out of Minho's hold when he dragged a technically naked Jisung out from his room._

_"Hahaha.... Sorry... sorry... i am just so excited... Let's put on some clothes for you." Minho grinned stupidly_

_"Let's?" Jisung didn't quite get what Minho meant by ‘let's’ yet. He's got his answer when Minho without care pulled off Jisung's towel and dressed him up despite his protest and complaint._

_"Shhhh... Sungie what's wrong by getting naked in front of me? It is just me." Minho smiled widely and succeeded in keeping a red faced Jisung silent._

_Later when Jisung was already in clothes Minho led him to a secluded hill in the west end of their Training Field._

_"See... It's pretty right Sungie? I just discovered this place and I noticed nobody comes here. So starting from today this place is going to be my secret place and I want to share this place with you. We'll be the only two people who know about this place." Minho explained proudly while he was still holding Jisung's hand after they practically ran to that place._

_And since that day Jisung knew that the other always visited the hill whenever he wanted to be alone. When they weren't 11 anymore, Minho rarely visited the hill, yet the frequency of his visit rose since the Great War._

"It's you again." 

Without changing his posture or opening his eyes Minho grunted. Jisung felt really bad for intruding Minho in his safest hide out yet this was his last chance. 

"Yes... it's me M-..." Just before he said Minho's name Jisung caught himself. 

**Remember Minho doesn't want you to call his name.**

"What is it this time?" Minho finally opened his eyes just to send a glare to Jisung's direction.He slowly sat down. Just like a knee jerk reaction Jisung felt extremely nervous like how he has always felt around him. Jisung gulped down silently. Minho's question sliced his heart It was obvious he didn't want him here. Minho was disturbed by Jisung's presence.

"I... I really need to talk to you." Yet, Jisung still managed to say his intention because he knew his time was limited. 

"Well... I don't want to talk to you. Case closed. Bye, see you, never again maybe?" Minho said easily without care.

Jisung stood still for a while. He honestly never got used to Minho's behavior even though he kept treating him badly.

"Please... Just this time... Please listen to me..." With his nails dug deep inside his right palm Jisung was able to continue. 

**Just this time Jisung, stop being a weakling!! Just focus on the pain inside your palm so you will be able to forget the pain in your heart**

"Stubborn, I see." Minho didn't say he wanted to listen to Jisung, yet he didn't leave. So Jisung took it as a signal that the other was going to listen this time. 

"It.... It's about my procession... I..." Using all of his powers Jisung finally broke the news, yet again just like last time Minho cut him. 

"Oh that... Yes... I've heard Jisung."

For a second Jisung felt like maybe everything would be okay. If Minho already knew about his situation it was going to be easier for him to deal with Jisung's shameless request.

"I am really glad you know it already... I..." Yet his hope was crushed when Minho opened his mouth again.

"Yes... I know about it Jisung. You must be really happy right? Everyone is now talking about your Deflowered procession. Everyone is wondering about who is going to be the lucky person to be chosen by you. Everyone out there wants to be the one. As expected, Jisung. As expected from someone like you, who likes to be the center of attention. You must be enjoying it. Did they start courting you now? Are they sending hints that they want to be chosen by you? You got what you wanted I see. You must be in ecstasy. Well... to be honest I’m not surprised, considering your personality. Remember what you did to my book back then? Jisung... I am really glad that you are achieving what you always wanted. But don't you feel at least a bit self-conscious? You get all the attention because they want to use your body. If I can give you advice, it's going to be better for you not to consider all of their courting and affection seriously. They don't actually want you. They only want your body. I mean... I am not trying to take your happiness away when you are almost there. I just want to remind you. Not that I care much. I am merely stating a fact. If I were you Jisung I would feel uncomfortable and ashamed of myself because I gathered attention in the wrong way. But I guess, you are you and me is me. So enjoy yourself."

Jisung's body shook almost visibly. He dug his nails deep inside his palm until he could feel something warm dripping from it.

**Focus on the pain inside your palm Jisung!!**

**Focus on the pain inside your palm!!**

**This is not new for you.**

**You already know how Minho feels about you.**

**You have always known that Minho thinks you are an embarrassment.**

**You have always known that Minho thinks you are only trash.**

**You have always known that Minho thinks you are the lowest human in this earth, the lowest human who still shamelessly chases after him.**

**The lowest human who is still without shame in love with him.**

"Oh... What is that you bring with you?" While Jisung tried his best to conceal all the effect of Minho's speech on him and contain his tears, the boys in front of him acted like nothing had happened. 

"Did my mother ask you to bring food for me?" Minho didn't mind that Jisung didn't answer his question; he harshly took away the plastic bag that Jisung was holding. "Oh... all my favorite dishes. Just great timing!" Minho's voice rose because of the excitement he felt when he saw what was inside the bag. "Say thanks to my mother. I always wanted Jeongyeon noona to taste her amazing cooking!' 

Jisung couldn't say that, in fact, he was actually the one that cooked all the dishes. He just nodded his head.

"I am leaving. I have to go to a dinner date with her." Minho rose and brought the plastic bag with him. 

Jisung didn't know that he could feel this kind of pain because of a piece of information given by Minho. 

**Of course Minho will like girls like Jeongyeon noona.**

**Jisung, who are you fooling?**

**Jeongyeon noona is the prettiest girl in District 9 Village.**

**Also, she is a strong and capable ninja.**

**Unlike me, who is a mere third ranking ninja. Jeongyeon noona is one of the most important people in the Strategic Division.**

**She has it all. Beautiful. Great body. Strong. Skillful. Smart.**

**And most importantly, Jeongyeon is a perfect match for someone like Minho.**

**Who do you think you are Jisung?**

**You are just being shameless, daring to love him like this.**

**You are not smart. You are weak.**

**No matter how hard you want Minho, he will be too far from your reach.**

“Oh and if you can do me a favor. Tell my mother that I will not come home tonight.”

Jisung thought it was impossible to feel more pain. He thought wrong.

_Mrs. Lee opened her door only to be greeted by a 10 year old Jisung crying._

_“Oh my God Jisung what happened?! Why are you crying like this sweetheart?” Even Mrs. Lee's warm hug and soft voice couldn’t bring Jisung the comfort he needed. The only person who can help him calm down is Minho._

_At that moment Minho appeared at the door after hearing his mom scream and Jisung sobs, and he instinctively wrapped his arms around his little body. “Oh God Jisung what happened? Who did this to you? Why are you hurting when I’m not around? Tell me who did this and I’ll go kill them right now.” for a second Minho thought Jisung stopped crying, but instead he started crying harder._

_“I’m sorry Minnie… I am really sorry… you can hit me, punch me, kick me, use your fire jutsu on me… I deserve it….I shouldn’t do this to you… but please don’t leave me…. Please don’t abandon me…”_

_In between his crying Jisung managed to say all those words. Minho actually didn't understand what Jisung was trying to say. Why would Minho want to hurt his little Sungie?. So Minho without much thinking brought Jisung up to his room, laid him down on his bed and snuggled him until he calmed down._

_Later on Minho finally knew what was bothering him. Jisung had stolen Minho's recent precious possession, a History Book of District 9 Hidden Ninja Village. Jisung did it because he was sad Minho ignored him for two days to read his book. So, he took the book from the other's room, wrapped it in black plastic bag and put it below his bed._

_Yet, what happened one day later was unexpected, Jisung's mother cleaned his son's room and thought inside the said plastic bag was trash. So she burned the plastic bag with other trash. After Jisung discovered the truth he panicked and tried to replace the book by using all of his money from the piggy bank. But, the book was really expensive and Jisung couldn't afford it so he panicked even more. He got the worst panic attack when the next day Minho didn't show up in school. He thought Minho didn't show up because he found out about his book and got mad at him. Thus Jisung ended up going to Minho's home while sobbing._

_"Silly, I am not mad at you. You should stop apologizing because I should be the one that asks for your forgiveness. I am sorry for paying more attention to my book. I won't do things like that again. Don't worry about the book, I can ask my father to buy me a new copy" Minho's smile that evening was what made Jisung smile after four restless days._

"I am sorry for your book Minho..." 

"I am sorry for loving you..." Jisung whispered softly to the grass on Minho's favorite hill. That day Jisung failed to tell Minho about what he actually wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi~ 
> 
> I feel like this story is not as good as I expected it to be, sorry. Also I'm sorry for updating a little late. My sleeping schedule is all messed up.
> 
> Edit: The past mail boy was supposed to be Woojin and not Lix because he appears in the next chapter; I told you my terrible sleeping schedule has me all messed up ha~ sorry!


	4. D - 1

When Jisung opened his eyes he was greeted by Blue, a bright blue feather pigeon owned by the great leader of District 9 village, Chan. Jisung nervously reached the scroll carried by Blue and in the next second the beautiful bird gracefully flew away. He examined the scroll carefully and noticed Chan’s seal. It was very rare to receive a scroll stamped by the leader. Usually ninjas would receive a scroll stamped by District 9 village seal. That fact made Jisung more nervous. He opened the scroll slowly not knowing what to expect.

**Jisung,**

**I am very sorry if I’m putting pressure on you, but by this afternoon you need to come and report to me your chosen procession partner. It is because although you are the one who chose him, I still need to prepare for it and perform the blood seal on him for the secrecy and confidential issue. I will need you to come by today at four in the afternoon. I'll see you later.**

Jisung breathed shallowly, by this afternoon he needed to ask Minho to be his partner. He had to. Now it didn't matter anymore to Jisung what the other’s answer would be. What mattered to him was he needed to convey this feeling to Minho so he could move on. He needed to do it so he would be able to let go of him without any regret.

Jisung had made a vow to himself that once he started taking missions from the Infiltration and Seduction Division he would move out from Minho's house and.... Minho's life. One of his reasons was because he wanted to make the other happy by vanishing. But his main reason was because he didn't have any confidence and pride to face him again. Two days ago Minho had made it clear that to him Jisung was just a prostitute. Four years ago Minho also had made it clear that he was good for nothing. Jisung knew he wouldn't be able to face him once he did the mission from the Infiltration and Seduction division. After he has used his body to seduce men to find out some information. After he would let himself be touched, tasted and taken by some strangers, he just couldn't face Minho anymore.

Actually, before Minho said that being in the Infiltration and Seduction Division was equal to being a prostitute, Jisung didn't really mind what people thought about ninjas in the said division. He thought that using one's body to commerce was just a way to show dedication to protect their beloved village. Some ninjas protected the village using their strengths. Others protected the village using their intelligence. But Jisung wasn't strong enough nor intelligent, thus if the only way he could protect the village was using his body then he would use his body. For the sake of their village and for the sake of protecting the people he loved. For protecting Minho.

Yet now after Minho had said it, Jisung realized that he was a fool. Minho found him a disgrace, a disgusting human being. So that is why Jisung insisted on confessing his love for Minho now, while he was at least still pure.

But luck wasn't on his side. Minho wasn't home yet. He had waited until 11 am to see if the other would show up, yet Minho wasn't there. As the second ticked and minutes went by, Jisung got more and more nervous. He couldn't wait for too long anymore, and without thinking he rushed to the place he thought Minho would be.

"Hi, Jisungie.. How are you?" Jeongyeon said kindly after she opened her apartment door. 

"Noona... I am sorry for bothering you. I just..." Now Jisung didn't dare to continue what he wanted to say. He came out of the house without much thinking but right now the realization hit him.

**How shameful Jisung...**

**What are you trying to do here?**

**Of course Minho won't be back to home yet, after days away from the village he will want to spend most of his time with his lover.**

**Especially since you are in his house.**

**Are you really trying to interrupt their private time?**

**You are trying to ask Minho to be your procession partner in front of his lover?**

**What a shame!!**

"Sorry if my clothing makes you feel uncomfortable. I just woke up." 

Jeongyeon mistook Jisung's silence. Jisung shook his head slowly while trying his best to smile. Now he noticed that Jeongyeon was in her sleeping attire. She was wearing only a blue oversized shirt and matching thighs length shorts. Jisung tried not to think too much about how beautiful Jeongyeon was compared to himself. Even when she just woke up and didn't have any makeup on. He also tried hard not to think about what might have happened last night between Minho and her in this apartment.

**You have no right to wonder about what happened between them last night, Jisung.**

**It is pretty common for couples to be engaged in sexual activities.**

**It is their right to do so.**

**You have no right to feel jealous let alone hurt because of it.**

"Jisungie... You seem to be quite unwell. Do you want to come inside and drink something?" Jeongyeon voiced her concern after Jisung didn't say anything for several minutes. 

"No... no need noona... I am sorry..." Jisung blushed because of embarrassment. 

He actually dared to compare himself to a wonderful girl like Jeongyeon. Jisung couldn't even bring himself to hate her. She had the kindest heart. She is even kind to someone like him, someone who tried to make her boyfriend a partner for a deflowered procession. But then again for Jisung this moment was a now or never moment.

"I am sorry for bothering you noona. I want to know if Minho is here because I need to talk to him about something important." He said while avoiding eye contact. He couldn't bring himself to look at her in the eyes. Here she was worried about his well being while the boy in question desired her lover.

**You are really the worst Jisung…**

**You still desire a boy who obviously has a perfect girl already by his side…**

**You chase after a boy who clearly is already in love with someone else…**

**You even dare to show your face in her house…**

**You dare to ask about his whereabouts to her…**

**You really want to make Minho cheat on his girlfriend don’t you?**

**You want to be touched by someone else’s lover…**

Jisung’s mind swirled with all negative thoughts about himself. He felt dizzy because of the heavy burden he shouldered.

**But just this time Jisung…**

**Just this last time…**

**You need to confess your feelings to Minho…**

**You have to...**

“Minho? He is not here Jisungie. Are you sure you don't want to come inside? I can do some medical jutsu for you. You look pale, you are obviously not okay.”

She reached for Jisung’s hand softly, her beautiful face full of worry.

“No noona… thank you… I need to do something important, I need to find Minho.”

“Seriously Jisung? I don’t want you to collapse. Do you need me to tell Minho about something when I meet him?”

Jisung only shook his head and smiled slightly before he nodded and left the apartment. Of course he didn’t have the guts to ask her to tell Minho that he wanted him to be his partner. How shameful of him if he dared to do that to her.

**Jeongyeon noona is an angel…**

**She is really kind…**

**She is going to be a perfect bride and wife to Minho…**

**Thank God, you let Minho be in love with someone like her…**

**They are perfect….**

**They deserve each other…**

Even though Jisung thought they were perfect for each other, he couldn't help the pain that spread through his body. Meeting Jeongyeon noona only made him realize what Minho actually wanted and what he could never be. Now he knew his place in Minho's life. He was just an audience in Minho's life. Someone that could only see him from afar and love him. Or maybe he was actually the villain. First he took away Minho's father and sister. Second, he stole Minho's mother's attention. Third, Minho's mother couldn't meet his son very often because of him. Four, he attempted to interrupt Minho and Jeongyeon’s private time. Fifth, he tried to make Minho his procession flower. Jisung was actually ashamed of himself yet he couldn't turn around now.

******

"Jisungie?" 

A tap on his shoulder was what made him snap out of his incoherent train of thought. 

"Hey... you look pale and unhealthy. Do you want me to perform medical jutsu on you?" 

It was the second time on that day he was called on for being pale and looking unhealthy. 

"That's really kind of you Felix... But... No... Thank you." Jisung was not even sure how he ended up on the east side of the Training Field or how Felix was here with him. He had tried his best to look for Minho but he wasn't anywhere. Not even on his favorite hill.

Of course he won't be there anymore Jisung... 

You disturbed his sanctuary... 

He isn't stupid enough to be there so you can bother him for the second time... 

"I am the best medic ninja now Jisungie..." It seemed Jising’s reluctance was taken as questioning of Felix's capability. He slowly managed to smile. 

"I know Felix, you are the best medic ninja in our village. In fact I think you are the best in the world, but I never go outside so my opinion might be invalid." Despite his hazy mind Jisung still managed to make a coherent conversation with Felix. It was true anyway, as the time went by, the once lonely and alienated small boy, Felix, had managed to be the most trustable and the best medic ninja in District 9. 

"Then... let me cure you." Felix showed his charming smile. Jisung couldn't react, he was pretty sure there was no jutsu, not even the best medical jutsu could mend his dying heart.

"I am okay, Felix... I am really okay..." **at least physically.** Jisung said the last words in his mind.

"No... you are definitely not okay Jisung. You have been staring into nothingness for the past 20 minutes. You didn't even hear me. No... don't say anything because I know what I am talking about. I've been here the whole time without concealing my chakras and you didn’t even know that I was here. You didn't even feel it when I stared closely at you." Felix softly turned Jisung's body to face his way. 

"You... were looking at me? Closely?" Of all the things Felix said he only caught the last sentence. 

"Yes." Felix answered casually as if admitting that he has been staring intently at one of your friends was the most normal thing to do. 

"Why..." Just as Jisung wanted to continue his sentence he was cut. 

"Because if you didn’t notice, which I am sure is the case, I like you Jisungie. No, I think, I love you." Felix conveyed confidently. 

Jisung could help but gaps loudly. "You like me?"

"No... I told you... I think I love you... oh no... scratch that I know I love you. And no... Not in the brother or friendship thingy way. I love you in a romantic way."

Jisung just stared at Felix's face in disbelief. He kept opening his mouth to say something but then closed it again. Minho's words suddenly rang on his mind.

_**“You get all the attention because they want to use your body.”** _

_**“If I can offer you advice, it's going to be better for you not considering all of their courting and affection seriously.”** _

_**“It is because they don't actually want you Jisung.”** _

_**“They only want your body.”** _

Was Felix one of the examples of how people suddenly show their affection to him because they want Jisung to choose them as his procession partner? As if Felix could hear his thoughts, he continued.

"And If you think that I only say all of those things because I want to be your procession partner. You are wrong Jisungie." Felix spoke softly. "I've been in love with you even before I know what love is. I've been in love with you since that day in preschool you offered me to be your friend. Since that day you smiled and promised to play with me every day. Even if you broke your promise to always play with me because you didn't want to upset your best friend, I know that you were watching over me. The candies and the notes that I always found in my desk drawer, I know those are from you. I know that you might only pity me because nobody wanted to play with me back then. Yet I couldn't help but fall for you. Because you were nice back then, because you are nice now and I know in the future you will always be nice too."

Jisung couldn't help all the blood that rushed into his face. It was not his first time people confessed to him. Yet, it was the first time a friend confessed to him.

"I am sorry I only managed to confess my feelings now. I couldn't do it before because I have always been afraid of your reaction. But as the time went by and I heard about your procession I know it is a now or never matter. I've heard about what some people are saying about you Jisungie. That you are nothing but a pretty face and incredible figure. I am afraid that rubbish talk will get into your head. So.. I need to confess my feelings to you now. You are an amazing person. A really loveable one Jisung. You don’tt know how it is actually so easy for people to like you and not only because of your appearance. I really love you Jisungie..."

Jisung felt a comfortable warm spread throughout his body. His heart started to pick an irregular beat because of Felix's words.

"I don't expect anything from you Jisungie... I am not trying to take advantage of your weak moment. I just want you to know that you are more than a pretty face and great body, you are Han Jisung." Felix smiled almost sadly. "I know there is no more space in your heart for me or any other man, but him, right Jisungie? I always know that even back then." Felix slowly caressed Jisung cheeks. "I wish I could be him so you would love me. I wish you could fall for me too. But reality says otherwise." 

Jisung couldn't help but choke on the air. Was his love for Minho really obvious? 

"Even if your happiness isn't with me, I want you to know that I will always be here for you. I will watch over you like you did to me years ago." Felix finally stopped his caressing. He slowly inched his face closer to Jisung. "Can I...?"

Jisung couldn't react when Felix closed the gap between them. It was going to be Jisung's first kiss and actually he wished to share it with Minho but he couldn't move his body, so he opted to close his eyes. To his surprise, after some second Jisung felt something warm on his right cheek and not on his lips.

"I really want to kiss you right now, but I don't want you to regret our kiss." Felix explained with a smile while Jisung was stunned. If only he could control his heart, he is sure he would have liked to fall in love with Felix instead. He was always a great person ever since he was just a kid and he grew up to be a perfect example of gentleman. But sadly he couldn't control his heart.

"I really am sorry Felix. I wish I could..." 

"Nothing... there is nothing for you to feel sorry Jisungie. I told you, your answer doesn't matter. I will still love you no matter what." 

Jisung couldn't help but feel that he was one ungrateful human being. He had a great man like Felix love him but he couldn't reciprocate his feelings.

"Jisungie... tomorrow I am going on a mission. An S rank mission." For a second Jisung didn't understand why Felix suddenly talked about the mission. "Minho is my teammate." 

When Felix finished his sentence Jisung grew restless.

"Chan assigned me and another teammate, this mission. That is when Minho suddenly comes and volunteers to be on this mission as well. He said the team will be incomplete without the presence of someone from the Strategic Division and Chan agreed with him."

Jisung felt all of his energy leave his body, unknown to him, his legs gave up. Minho would go on a mission on the day of his deflowered procession. He won't be there. Now, even if he agreed to be his partner, he couldn't do it because he needed to go on a mission. There was nothing Jisung could do because once it was decided a ninja needed to go on a mission there was nothing that could cancel it.

"Jisungie... you still have a chance; remember he is only a volunteer. The mission will be able to go through even if he isn't there. My teammate and I can handle the mission." Felix helped him to stand up. "He must be in your home right now to make preparations. Go Jisungie... you need to go."

******

Jisung wasn't sure how he got into his home in record time. One minute he was in the east side of the Training Field yet the next minute he was in front of Minho's room. Like a reflex Jisung eyes darted to the clock in the hallway, 3:30 it said.

"Why am I not surprised that you are here? Especially after I hear from Jeongyeon noona that you paid her a visit to look for me." The second he stepped inside Minho's room he was graced by Minho's comment. "To what do I owe the pleasure to be visited by you three days in a row?" Minho sarcastically said while he kept moving to collect all the stuff he needed for his mission. 

"Minho... Are you going on a mission tomorrow...."

It was more to a statement than a question. Jisung's mind couldn't function right. He even disregarded Minho's wish for not calling him by his name. Jisung's mind wouldn't work properly. He needed to be in Chan’s office in 30 minutes, time was running out.

"Yes... I am going on a mission tomorrow and I don't see why it matters to you." Minho shrugged indifferently. 

"BECAUSE IT MATTERS TO ME!!" 

All of his pent up frustration and the constant pain in his chest made him do something unexpected. Never once in his life Jisung thought he would be able to yell at Minho and at Jisung's outburst the other finally stopped moving around and gave his full attention to him. 

"I don't see why..." 

"Because it really matters to me Minho. It really matters. Tomorrow is my deflowered procession."

Before Minho had a chance to throw any hurtful words, Jisung already cut him off. Seconds passed by with both of them not saying anything. Jisung eyes were glistening with unshed tears; he buried his nails to his right palm deeply. Meanwhile Minho only stood with an unreadable expression.

"Minho... please... you are my only friend... my best friend... I want you to be there tomorrow." Jisung didn't know why he was being so emotional right now. But maybe all the pressure, stress and frustration finally got him. He was a mess right now. 

"Friend?" Minho chuckled without humor. "You want me to be there tomorrow because I am your friend?" 

Minho’s sharp tone didn't have any more effect on Jisung. He had promised no matter what happened he would confess his feelings to the other and ask him to be his partner even if that was shameless.

"Yes... Because of that." Jisung used all of his last drops of energy to say that.

"What do you want me to do? Do you want me to hold a party in honor of your deflower procession? Do you want me to invite all of the people in this village to celebrate? Do you want me to provide all of your favorite food for the party? Do you want me to throw confetti on you once you step into the party? Do you want me to congratulate you for going through your deflower procession? Or do you want me to hold a huge banner with the words 'CONGRATULATION FOR BEING A PROSTITUTE. A TOY BOY FOR SOME RANDOM DISGUSTING MAN. CONGRATULATION FOR GIVING YOUR BODY SO EASILY TO SOME RANDOM STRANGER'? DO YOU WANT ME TO DO THAT?"

Minho's voice was steadily rising with each word until he was finally yelling at the end of his sentence. Jisung's whole body was shaking violently. The effect of Minho's words was fatal to his heart and body. He could no longer hold his tears.

"No.. I don't want any of that, I don't want any of those awful things you are saying..." Jisung stammered with his words and was finally able to produce a sentence in a soft tone. His head hung so low. He didn't understand how Minho thought that lowly of him. Why in Minho's eyes, he was only a prostitute? A greedy attention whore? Why?

"Then tell me about what you want Jisung." Minho sighed.

Jisung snapped his neck so quickly, he thought he broke it. It has been a long time since Minho called him by his given name. He could see the tremendous amount of emotions colored in Minho's eyes but he couldn't recognize what those emotions were.

"My partner for the procession, Minho... I..." Before Jisung could continue what was in his mind he was silenced by Minho's menacing laughter. 

"Oh... so that’s what you need me for?" Minho directed his sharp glare to Jisung eyes while Jisung could only nod his head. 

"So you want me..." 

**Yes... I really want you Minho...**

**I really do...**

Jisung mind screamed restlessly. 

"...to give you advice on whom you should choose as your partner?" 

Minho's next words made Jisung’s brain malfunction. 

**NOO!!**

**YOU MISUNDERSTAND!!**

Jisung's mind shrieked and wailed yet his body couldn't move at all and he couldn't formulate any coherent sentence. Again Minho laughed loudly. There was something in Minho's laugh that Jisung couldn't pinpoint.

"Yeah... I guess I understand your point. I guess when you have too many people to choose from it becomes complicated. What confused you about Jisungie?" Even though his name was called fondly, Jisung could feel that Minho was actually mocking him.

"Do you have a problem in deciding who will have your body? What are the choices of Jisung? Jeongin, who is a cute hoobae to you? Seungmin and Changbin who always stare lustfully at you in your so called practice session? Felix, the gentle boy who likes you? Woojin, the kindhearted and fatherly figure? Hyunjin, my best friend? Chan ,the mighty leader? Your life is full of dilemmas I see, everyone wants a piece of you. Why don't you just throw a dice to decide who gets to fuck you? Why don't you have them to fight each other until there is one winner and the rest are dead? I am sure you can gather more attention if you do that. You will be the talk of the town and you will be so happy." Minho chortles without humor. His voice was cold and distant. "Or if it is you, I think the best solution is for you to have them all to fuck you. If you do that you will be so. You will be in heaven because of all the attention."

Minho smirked menacingly. Yet in a second the smirk faded away and was replaced by a surprise expression. Not even in thousand years it crossed Minho's mind that Jisung could slap him. Yet, here he was. His right cheek was burning because of the force Jisung used on him.

"Why....? Why Minho? Why are you being so mean?...Why can't you stop assuming things for a while and listen to me? Just this time..."

Jisung's face was full of tears. His face was red because of anger and frustration. His body was trembling continuously. Between sobs he managed to voice his mind to Minho.

"Tsk.. I am not being mean here. I am being realistic. And no....l am not assuming things. I just say what I observe." 

Jisung's state didn't seem to bother Minho at all. Arrogantly he crossed his arms across his chest. Minho resisted the urge to touch his burnt right cheek. 

"Then... Just this time... Just this last time, listen to me... Give me the last chance... Hear me out..." Jisung was beyond desperate. He didn't know why it was so hard to confess his feelings or why he still wanted to go through with it when Minho was being so mean to him.

"No Jisung. No... You have lost all of your chances to be heard by me. No..." 

Jisung really didn't know what he could do now. Minho has robbed every ounce of his confidence and energy. Minho has crashed Jisung's heart. Minho didn't even want to listen to him. Tears fell heavily from Jisung eyes, he couldn't even regulate his breath anymore. Until finally his legs gave away and he slumped to the bedroom floor like a wet rag while Minho only watched emotionlessly.

"Why do you hate me so much Minho?" Jisung whispered almost inaudibly. 

"Because you are a Han."

Jisung didn't really think that Minho would answer him. Yet he did and he couldn't do anything but cry harder. Through his blurred vision he could see the other leave the room.

**If you hate me because lam a Han then what can I do Minho?**

**I cannot change the fact that I am a Han...**

**I was born this way...**

**I’m sorry…**

******

"You really make me worry Jisung." 

Chan was acting out of his habit. His calm demeanor was nowhere to be seen. His usually stone eyes were full of worry. 

"I really am sorry I just came at this time. It is inexcusable behavior of mine." It was 6 o'clock, Jisung had just shown up at Chan’s office even though two hours had passed since the time of his appointment with the leader. 

"It's okay Jisung, as long as you are fine then everything will be okay." Chan tried his best to neutralize his panic demeanor to make the younger feel better. 

"About my procession partner." Jisung started carefully. Anyone with eyes could see that Jisung wasn't okay. His jumpy attitude and swollen eyes were perfect evidence.

"Yes?" Chan inquired patiently.

"I've thought long and hard about this matter. I think it is better for me to follow the rules and tradition. I really am sorry if I just say it now. But after long thinking I realize that the rules and tradition are made to protect people who go through the procession. I mustn't choose my own partner because I will misuse it and abuse the right. I use my personal feelings too much while that act is inappropriate. I should just go with the tradition and let the board members choose my most suitable partner." Jisung tried to deliver the news as composed as possible. 

Chan's eyes widened. "Jisung... wait... you mean you want me and the board members to choose your procession partner instead?" 

"Yes... I am sorry I just say it now. That is really inconsiderate of me." Jisung now it was such a short notice and a low rank ninja like him shouldn't pull this kind of thing. 

"Jisung are you sure? You can choose anyone with the right given to you. Anyone you trust and you favor." Chan tried his best not to bring a name in this sentence, even though the name was already in the tip of his tongue.

"Yes...I am sure Chan. Thank you so much for giving me a great privilege. But it is too big for someone like me. I cannot handle that privilege. Also, after thinking, I trust the board member and your judgment the best. I am going to go through the procession as I suppose to."

Jisung answered easily. Somehow Chan could see that standing in front of him wasn't the Jisung that he knew. Jisung had transformed into a robotic human being who was ready to take any order.

"You know, Jisung. To tell you the truth I actually want to rethink about putting you in the Infiltration and Seduction Division. There are so many proposal letters from village leaders and princes coming to my office. All of those letters are talking about the same thing, a wedding proposal for you." Chan didn't know what came to him but he suddenly regretted his decision to promote Jisung to the Infiltration and Seduction Division. 

"So you want me to marry one of them." 

Chan nodded his head absentmindedly. 

"Technically, if you marry any of them it will be good for the village because we can form a strong ally.”

For some reason Jisung's lack of emotion scared Chan, but he was the leader so he had to convey what he must do. 

"Sure. I will marry any of them if you want me to do so, so I can protect the village." Jisung smiled without emotions.

"Actually it has been the talk among the board members; they think it will be great for you to marry one of them after your procession. That way you can be still part of our District 9 ninja village. They think it will be a win- win situation. We couldn't just let you go because you are the last Han alive, the only ninja with a light element. By doing that we could still have you and the person that wants you marry you also can have you."

Chan actually didn't want to say all of those things to Jisung but he didn't have a choice. He was the leader of District 9. His greatest concern was ensuring the safety of his village. Because he was fully aware that none of those proposal letters were friendly. All of it threatened to attack District 9 village if Jisung was working under the Infiltration and Seduction Division or if Jisung didn't get married soon.

"Sure Chan, if that is what must be done then I have no objection." Jisung replied obediently. Chan could see that Jisung's eyes were dead.

"I... I am glad... you don't have any objection." 

"Sure, I will take my leave now. I promise I won't be late for my procession tomorrow." Jisung smiled once again but his smile didn't reach his eyes at all. Jisung knew this was his fate; he would marry a stranger after his procession ended. But he guessed that what he was good for because like Minho had said several times Jisung was no good for a ninja. So he would do what he could do to protect the village.

******

In the middle of night Jisung was woken up by a rustle in his bed. Without warning he was evolved in a warm hug. 

"Mother?" Jisung asked sleepily yet he knew that the person who hugged him was Minho's mother. 

"Shhh... It is mom Sungie." Minho's mother hugged him even tighter. "Let me hug you tonight, dear. Cry if you want to cry." 

Jisung could feel a soft finger thread his hair gently. 

"Mother..." Jisung tried to escape from the hug not to avail. 

"No... It's not mother Sungie. It’s mom, your mom. I am here darling. I am here for you." 

That was all Jisung needed to finally put out his charade. He hugged Minho's mother back, without warning he began to cry like a small child. He sobbed really hard and wailed between his hiccups. 

"It's okay Sungie... Mom is here..." 

_"Sungie!" An 8 years old Minho whined loudly._

_"Yes, Minnie... what is it?" young Jisung replied._

_"Why do you call my mom, ‘mother’?" Jisung could see that Minho was definitely pissed off. But he didn't know why. What's wrong with calling his mom ‘mother’? Jisung’s mom has taught him that that was the correct way to address his friends' mother._

_"Am I wrong Minnie?" Jisung blinked his eyes several times._

_"Yes... of course it was absolutely wrong Sungie!! You are supposed to call her mom." Minho pinched Jisung's cheeks because he thought Jisung was being cute._

_"But..."_

_"Sungie... You are my future bride and wife!! My parents are your parents too. And your parents are my parents. So you need to call her mom, okay?"_

_Jisung didn't actually know that it worked that way but he still nodded his small pretty head because he knew Minho was always right._

_"Okay, I will call them mom and dad"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I say angst with happy ending? I'm sorry. I honestly don't know yet if it will have a complete happy ending. But I'm sure it won't be completely sad either. I think the tag doesn't belong here. Also for the last chapter, I think is going to be much more shorter compared to others :(


	5. D - Day

Jisung woke up with a very heavy heart. He couldn’t find the strength to get up, but he knew he had to get ready for the procession, he got up and walked to the bathroom to shower and get ready for the long day ahead of him.

After he got out of the shower he walked to the window in his room. Jisung stood quietly as he was staring at the gate of District 9 ninja village. From his window he could clearly see the gate.

Walking down stairs he glanced to Minho’s closed door.

**Goodbye Minho…**

**Thank you for letting me love you all these years…**

**I really love you and I am sorry for that…**

**Sorry for bothering you so much…**

**Sorry that I cannot change the fact that I am a Han...**

“He is not here.” Jisung heard her voice behind him. He turned around to face Minho’s mother. “He came back really late after he walked out and just took his stuff for his mission and left.” She said with a very sad voice and sad eyes. 

Jisung hugged her. “It’s okay mother, I’m sure after this mission he will be home more often. He will stay here for longer days.”

“I really hope so Jisungie..” she smiled sadly.

“I have to go now mother.” Jisung said while pulling away. He looked at her eyes and could only see sadness, not only for Minho but for him as well. “I will be fine… you don’t have to worry about me… I will be okay.” Jisung offered a smile, hoping she couldn’t see what he was really feeling.

“I know Jisungie, I know you are a strong boy. If you ever need me, I will always be right here with open arms.” there was a pause before she continued, “You know, Minho doesn’t hate you. He cares about you a lot. He is just still hurt. Give him some time and he will come back again.” Jisung was surprised to say the least. He never expected Minho's mother to ever acknowledge their current relationship as she always acted like she didn’t know anything, like everything was alright.

Before Jisung could start crying he walked to the door. He didn’t want to cry in front of her.

“I know mother… I know... Thank you for everything you have done for me up till now… I have to go now but I also wanted to say, thank you for last night. It really helped me alot to have someone hug me to sleep.” Before she could say anything else Jisung walked out the door. He didn’t get to hear what she said next.

“But… last night I didn’t go to your room…”

******

Jisung was walking to the District 9 ninja village leader’s office. He walked past Minho’s favorite hill and decided to be there one last time. 

**This is it…**

**I probably won’t come back here again…**

**After this I will probably be married off…**

**It’s okay…**

**I will be okay…**

**Minho will be okay…**

**Everything will be okay…**

Taking a look around one last time he decided to continue his path to the office. 

“Hey Jisungie” He heard a very sweet voice call for him and he instantly recognized it.

“Hey Jeongyeon noona” Jisung answered, offering a smile.

“You look sick again, is everything okay?” She asked him with worried eyes.

“I’m fine… I’m just on my way to Chan’s office.” he replied, still offering a smile that didn’t quite reach his ears.

“Ah… I heard about it from Minho. Everything will be fine Jisungie. I know you will be okay.”

“Minho?” Jisung asked, surprised. “You heard from Minho?” 

**Why would Minho talk about me…**

**Why would Minho talk about me to his girlfriend…**

**Why would he when he hates me so much…**

“Did I say something wrong?” Jeongyeon snapped Jisung out of it. She could clearly see he was deep in thought.

“I… NO you didn’t.. It's just I’m surprised he would talk about me to you.. I’m surprised he would talk about me at all..” He replied with very big eyes.

  
Jeongyeon chuckled, “Why wouldn’t he? Don’t be silly.. He talks about you a lot… but you didn’t hear it from me okay?” She said, still smiling.

To say Jisung was shocked was an understatement. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Did Minho really talk about him that much? Then why didn’t he talk to him at all? Jisung thought it was probably badmouthing him like he always does, and venting to his girlfriend about how much he hates him. But Jisung was running out of time. He needed to be in the office in 15 minutes so he couldn’t ask for details.

“I’m sorry noona, I really have to go or I’ll be late.” He said, but didn’t move. “Noona I want you to promise me something.. Can you?”

“Of course Jisungie what is it?” She answered while Jisung reached for her pretty hands.

“Please take care of Minho. Please give him all the love I couldn’t give him. I know he seems cold, but he is actually a really sweet person. I know he can make you happy and I know you will make him very happy too. I’m sorry he talked about me a lot to you. I’m sure you were probably annoyed by it. I just want to wish both of you all the happiness in the world.”

“Thank you Jisungie. I promise to take care of him, but I don’t quite understand what you are saying.” Jeongyeon answered with a tilt of her head, clearly confused at what she was hearing.

“I know Minho loves you, and I hope you love him just as much. He has been through a lot and he deserves to be happy. He deserves to be loved” Jisung was almost crying now, but he held it in for the sake of not looking weak.

“Jisung I think you are confused. Minho and I are not dating.” Jeongyeon chuckled a little bit and held Jisung’s hands tighter. “Minho and I are just friends, very good friends. I don’t know what made you think like that but Minho doesn’t love me, he loves someone else.” She smiled sweetly. “And I don’t like boys, Jisung. I have a girlfriend.”

**He loves someone else…**

**Oh how did that hurt even more…**

Jisung thought he was ready to move on and let Minho be happy because he knew he had a good girl besides him. How wrong he was? Minho loved someone else. Sadly he didn’t have time to ask more because he was running late. He gave Jeongyeon a last hug and said his goodbyes.

“I’m sorry noona, I didn’t know”

“It’s okay Jisungie you should talk to him yourself about that. But I want you to know, you deserve to be happy too.” and with that Jisung left.

******

“You are here. Are you ready?” Chan greeted Jisung at the door. “Since you are just in time we have to get ready now” Chan had Jisung follow him to the room where the procession will take place.

After Chan performed the jutsu on Jisung he walked out the room and left him alone to wait for his partner since the jutsu needed a little time to work fully.

Jisung couldn't help the hard beating of his heart as he was waiting for his partner to enter the provided room. He was nervous, so nervous and the quietness of the room didn't help him to calm his nervousness. His mind was fuzzy but suddenly Jisung could hear footsteps approaching the room. The sound got closer and closer while his heart pounded even louder and louder. He heard the footsteps stop in front of his room and suddenly his mind got blank and hazy.

It's the genjutsu... Jisung's mind told him.

Jisung barely had time to adapt to the haziness of his mind when someone, who Jisung presumed was his partner, entered the room without hesitation and locked the door behind them. Jisung's hazy mind made him unable to couldn't control his movement and his body. It felt as if all the bones inside Jisung's body had turned into jelly.

**Don't panic Jisung...**

**You have known about it...**

**The genjutsu will disable you to control your body and movement...**

**It is normal Jisung...**

Due to his inability to move, Jisung stayed sitting on the bed provided. He watched as his partner got near and near. He couldn’t see quite well his partner but he was sure he had seen him somewhere before. Scratch that, Jisung has seen him a lot before.

**Minho??!!**

Jisung's mind screamed loudly as soon as he saw his partner. But he knew it was impossible. His partner was cladded in District 9 ninja gear. He was also wearing the mask designed to protect one's identity during a mission that requests anonymously. Jisung couldn't register the color of his partner's hair because of his hazy mind. He couldn't even tell if his partner was tall or short, lanky or buffy, thin or fat.

**Yeah...**

**keep telling yourself that Jisung...**

**You heard it with your own ears that Minho left for his mission in the middle of the night...**

**So it is impossible for your partner to be him...**

**You have heard from others that some ninjas encountered a Clouded Condition during the procession...**

  
  
**A really deep desired condition for any candidate of the Infiltration and Seduction Division because if you are in that condition it means you will start picturing your partner as your loved one...**

**So at least you can go through the procession with the image of your loved one...**

**Now you are in Clouded Condition...**

**Be grateful Jisung...**

His scattered mind tried to reason with his first reaction to think that his partner was Minho.

"We will start the procession." Jisung couldn't help but think that he heard Minho's soft sweet voice from his partner's mouth. 

"o... Okay..." Jisung said it with so much effort. 

The next second, he had his partner slowly lay him down the bed and started untying his shirt to undress him. Jisung didn't resist and even if he wanted to, the genjutsu won't allow him. So Jisung opted to close his eyes and waited for the next thing to happen. He felt the cool air greet his naked torso. He was embarrassed, he knew he didn’t have a great body, yet he didn't have any power to hide it.

**Okay...**

**It will end soon enough Jisung...**

**Just keep picturing Minho...**

**Keep picturing him…**

Jisung could feel his partner’s hand hovering over his body slowly traveling down to his pants. Jisung was so nervous. But he didn't resist. Couldn't resist. He waited, scared, for his partner to take off his pants. Yet after some moments his partner didn't move at all. Jisung didn't understand what actually happened.

"You are shaking so much..." his ears were filled by his partner's worried sweet voice, which Jisung pictured as Minho's voice. He was pulled from his laying position to sit with his back to the headboard and his partner sat side by side with him.

"So.. sorry... I ... I am ... nervous..." Jisung's small voice could barely be heard. 

"Are you sure you are ready for this? If you are not ready we could tell Chan that you need more time before you can join your division." That sweet voice made Jisung feel even more fuzzy, but he didn't know why his partner asked him whether he was ready or not. His partner wasn't supposed to utter even a word to him. But it actually felt nice, because on Jisung's mind, it was Minho who asked him all of those questions. 

"I... I am ready... I have to..." The genjutsu made Jisung slurry. 

"Who forced you to do this? Let me know." Jisung thinks his partner really needs to stop talking and stop making him feel this way. He feels so protected and loved by a complete stranger.

Jisung raised his eyebrow. Why? Why did it seem like his partner cared about him? He was supposed to have a partner without personal attachment to him. The procession should be carried professionally without any feeling. Why did they have this conversation? Jisung really didn't know yet he didn't mind because 'Minho' was being nice to him right now.

"No...nobody... I just want to protect him..." Even if Jisung didn't understand why his partner acted that way, he couldn’t resist not joining the conversation. 

"Him?" His partner asked. Jisung pictured Minho's confused face and the image made him smile. "Who? The person you love?" He asked again. Now Jisung could only nod his head. The room was silent after the revelation. No movement was made. 

"Then... you can picture me as the person that you love.” The silence was broken by Jisung's partner's words. He blinked his eyes. "I think it will make the whole procession easier for you if you do that. And you don't have to worry about me telling other people. I am silenced by blood seals. Even if I want to I cannot talk to anyone about the procession."

Jisung was startled by his partner's statement. Never once he heard about this kind of thing happening during a deflowered procession. The procession was supposed to be impersonal and business like.

"Picture me as him Jisungie..." His partner suddenly made a move to lie him down on the bed again. 

Jisung again was only able to nod. He couldn't tell his partner that yes... he actually had pictured him as Minho once he stepped into the room.

His partner's big hands finally moved down to get rid of Jisung's pants and underwear, gently taking them completely off. He was now completely naked. He was sure his face was completely red by now because of embarrassment. He felt the other stare at him up and down before doing anything.

He gasped without sound when his partner dragged his big fingers over his nipples, pinching and teasing them eagerly until Jisung felt like his body was on cloud nine and he was sure he was getting hard.

"No... Ahh… No..” Jisung couldn't help but moan. The feeling was too good yet he was embarrassed because no one had seen him in this vulnerable state. He felt ashamed of his reaction when his partner wasn’t doing much yet.

"No? Why not Jisungie? Let me pleasure you. Let me make you feel good"

The back of Jisung's mind was screaming that what his partner was doing was wrong. He was not here to pleasure Jisung. He was supposed to help Jisung through the procession. Yet before he could say anything the fingers moved away from his nipples, tracing slowly every dips of his stomach and body. The trails made him shiver in pleasure. The fingers finally settled on the inside of his thighs and slowly pried them open.

"You are so beautiful Jisung... Really Beautiful..." his partner sighed like he was looking at the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

Again Jisung kept repeating in his mind that it was wrong. It was too intimate for them. It shouldn't go this way. Yet his body betrayed him, he willingly opened his legs for his partner so he could settle between them. 

He felt soft hands caressing his thighs and his partner leaning down to press wet kisses along his shoulders, to his collarbones, until he reached his neck. His body arched when he felt said hands reach for his almost completely hard cock and started jerking it in different motions. His hazy mind that kept telling him that it was Minho with him right now didn't help Jisung at all.

**No good...**

**No good...**

**It is too good...**

**It is wrong!!**

Jisung's mind kept warning him over and over again, yet his hip involuntarily thrusted forward into his partner’s hand so his cock was getting the friction he wanted. He was thrusting until he felt something coiling in his lower stomach. He knew he was close. Yet before he could reach his peak, his partner withdrew his hand.

"No... please... no..." Jisung whined shamelessly without realizing it he was begging to be touched again. 

"It is okay Jisungie... It is okay... I'll give you a greater pleasure... just be patient."

Jisung saw his partner pull out something from his pocket. He figured it was lube so he turned his head away because he was shy. The other only chuckled lightly and Jisung swore he has heard it a lot before. His partner squirted some lube on his fingers and moved to a confortable position.

"It will sting at first a little but, but I’ll be gentle I promise. If it gets too much just let me know so I can stop and wait for you to adjust.” He was kindly warned.

Jisung felt his rim being nudged with one cold finger, and true to his partner’s words, he felt a sharp sting when the finger finally entered him. His partner must have felt him tense up.

"Relax Jisungie... Relax..."

After a while Jisung finally felt himself relax and felt the finger move in and out of him slowly. A few minutes later Jisung was whining again for more, so his partner complied and entered a second finger in his hole. Jisung gasped, he wasn’t sure if it was because of pain of pleasure, maybe a mix of both. Fingers started pumping in and out of him at a faster speed and Jisung couldn’t help the moan that escaped his lips. It felt too good, way too good. The pleasure built slowly. 

“I’m going to add another finger, Jisungie, I need you to relax and breathe. If it's too much let me know.” It wasn’t too much. At first it felt uncomfortable but after a few pumps, Jisung was a moaning mess. It didn't take long for him to start trying to thrust his hips on the other's fingers.

“I think you are ready now..."

Jisung didn't fully register his partner's words because he focused more on the feeling of emptiness that came to him after the fingers were no longer inside him. So it was a surprise for Jisung when he felt something hard and big at his entrance. He choked on air when he felt a big force trying to enter him. He was literally in tears by now because of the pain. His partner kept entering him little by little he thought it was never going to end.

"Shhh... Don't cry Jisungie.. Let me in... Let me have you... I won’t hurt you."

Jisung didn't even notice that he was crying until his partner wiped away his tears with his thumb. It hurts. The pain was sharp and strong. Yet his partner's words made Jisung feel better and finally able to relax.

Minho... Minho... Jisung's mind chanted over and over again. 

"Can I move Jisungie?" His partner asked patiently. 

Jisung could only nod weakly. The pain was still there but he knew he needed to go through it. After giving permission, his partner started to move his body. Jisung whimpered for some moments because of the uncomfortable feeling. His partner moved slowly. He pulled almost all the way out until his tip was the only thing in and pushed inside again. Jisung could only keep his eyes closed and gasp at the feeling.

He repeated the motion until the thrusts became faster and faster, yet the pain subsided more and more. All Jisung he could feel was an unfamiliar great sensation that started spreading through his body.

"Ahh.. faster...please" Jisung was finally able to say something, even though he wasn’t intending to say those words. 

Without being told twice Jisung could feel that his partner started thrusting faster. He was starting to think this person wasn’t human at how fast he was moving. At one particular thrust Jisung suddenly wailed. He felt his whole body buzz from the intense feeling.

"Ahhh... there... what was that... ahh! right there… please" 

His partner only nodded his head while chuckling amusedly and started hitting the same spot over and over again. Jisung's mind was now in mess. Everything felt too much. Too good. He felt his stomach start tightening and he knew he was close. He gripped the sheets even harder. 

"Min... Minho... Minnie... Please..." Without knowing he finally let out the name that was on the tip of this tongue the whole time. Unexpectedly his partner stopped moving altogether. 

"Minho?" His partner asked in an unreadable tone. 

"Yes.... Minho please..." The words passed Jisung lips smoothly. Jisung clearly couldn't think right at all. He was desperate because he was being denied of his peak twice. He opened his eyes to look at his partner's face and he could swear he saw tears in the other's eyes, but he must have seen wrong. He couldn’t think straight. “...please Minho… fuck me.”

"O...okay..." Finally his partner started moving again and this time in a greater pace and irregular rhythm. 

His thrust always met Jisung sweet spot dead on. So it was no surprise that only after several thrusts Jisung finally exploded and screamed Minho's name loudly, cum covering his stomach. This made his hole clench around his partner so after only five more thrust the other also exploded inside the smaller with a grunt. 

Jisung was still in his high, so he didn't immediately realize the warmth that spread into his body.

**No... it was wrong...**

**He is not supposed to leave evidence...**

**He should use protection...**

**I am a carrier...**

**It is not good at all…**

Jisung's mind was in panic the moment he realized what his partner just did. Jisung was about to say it to his partner when his partner pulled out of him slowly and spoke to him again.

"Now... I need to perform another genjutsu on you Jisungie.." and just in seconds Jisung felt his eyes getting heavier and heavier and he felt himself getting covered in a soft blanket.

"I really want to kiss you right now Sungie... Sorry..." Before he could completely submit to sleep Jisung saw his partner tore off his mask and inch closer to his face where he could clearly see big eyes with long eyelashes tearing up. “I love you..”

**Is that you?**

**Is that really you?**

Jisung's confused mind startled at the sight, and soon after he felt soft lips press against him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before someone asks, The person that visited Jisung the the night before was indeed his mother. It was her spirit. 
> 
> I'm not great at writing smut but I tried my best, sorry.
> 
> The ending was actually supposed to be shorter but I got carried away and wrote more than expected. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone that read up till now.


End file.
